Confusion

I am now at this stage of life where I have to sort of decide what I want to be in the future let alone if I can or not. I'm not sure if I should go to college or form 6. There are pros and cons for each of them. I am actually going to go for accounting as I am in arts stream and my class takes accounts and economics(econs). I chose accounting is not because I have outstanding results for it but if i were to compare my results for accounts and econs, my accounts results are better and I'm more interested in accounting than econs as I am kinda bad at things which needs memorising such as history.

I am not from a wealthy family. I am not even sure if my parents are being able to send me to college and I am indecisive of going to college or form 6 is better for me so I actually have this mindset that if I get a full scholarship, I will go for college and if I don't, I'll just go for form 6. I actually applied for a scholarship by Sunway College with my mid-term results and went for interview. I was rewarded RM10, 000 but it was separated into 3 semesters which are RM4,000 for semester 1 and RM3,000 for semester 2 and 3. I dont think it is enough to cover the cost that I applied which is Australian Matriculation programme so I rejected it. Until now, I have not applied for any other scholarships as I do not know what are available for me.

I heard that Tunku Abdul Rahman College (TARC) offers full scholarship for any SPM students that achieved straight A's in their actual SPM results so I might be aiming for that. I'm now hoping that I'll get straight A's for my SPM as that is really what I wanted to achieve or even straight A+'s. I know this might sound greedy but that's what I really really wanted. I am really really scared that my results will turn out bad as this year's SPM is very different from the previous years. They added Higher Order Thinking Skills (HOTS) question into every subject and changed the formats for some subjects as well so it is really difficult for us to score :( and as for moral, they totally changed the format for the essay part. Usually, we are asked moral values and we are supposed to answer according to the format but they changed the questions to ways and lesson learnt.That is why I am really worried for my results..

I am very worried that if I applied for scholarships using my forecast results, and if my actual SPM results did not meet their minimum requirement, which is at least 5As then my parents will have to pay for my college fees. This is the worse thing I could think of right now. Someone please help me decide what should I do. I am so scared that what if i make the wrong decision and it does not only ruin my future but bring trouble to my parents too :(